The way things are

Life is a really hard game. The pieces keep falling out of those teeny little cars!

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Ok I'll tell you about my weekend

My birthday wasn't incredibly exciting, but I did have great fun with my boys at PF Chang's and then later at my house. Also, AtP and I watched the cooking channel and made cinamon rolls. A bunch of old friends called to wish me a happy day, and it was just that. Happy. So no complaints here.

Saturday Gogie and I drove around American Fork after our unsuccessful trip to Kohl's. Then we went camping with a bunch of peoples. It was fun but I got zero sleep. I think I prefer bonfires with no sleepovers.

Sunday was interesting. I slept through some of church but I did go to all three hours. Grandma's house was really fun because we played two games of Rook. I took an old double deck of her Rook cards so I need to teach a bunch of you how to play. I got my presents from my parents and was thrilled with all my new movies. I then talked to the Jet on the phone for several hours, and then to the Native for about a half hour.

The next morning I was nervous. Actually I was nervous all day Sunday too, but I was really nervous Monday morning. Something this weekend prompted a friend and I to sit down and talk about how we felt about each other. Those of you who read my other blog know that I have trouble talking to people about how I feel. And those of you who know me really well know that it sometimes really upsets me when my friends are having a rough time. I knew that being honest was going to be hurtful, which made me even more nervous.

It actually went well, and we were both really honest. He put on a good face and we both decided it would be best to leave things as they are. I don't know how upset he was, if he was at all, but I know he had to be sad. I mean, I've been there, and I know how much it sucks. So I felt really bad. I really don't like causing others pain, especially people that I really care about. So I wasn't in the greatest mood.

However, I was glad it was over with and I was really looking forward to FHE at the Matis' house. I treated myself to ice cream before we went, and then we got there and it was exactly what I needed. The Native came, which meant a lot to me, and I got to meet a bunch of people and see other people that I already knew. The speaker was fabulous and I loved her message. Brother and Sister Matis talked to the Native, the Baker's Son, and I for a long time. They were so sweet. And as Brother Matis was talking about his son and about all the Mohos, I felt so much love for all of you. Really, it has been such a blessing in my life to have such amazing friends. I told the Baker's Son that this [gesturing around] was just what I needed. He laughed and looked around and said, "Gay people?" I laughed to0, but really, that was what I had needed. Not just gay people, but my friends. My boys. There are times when I can see your eternal potential and it just amazes me. Honestly, I have a special place in my heart for you all, and I was just surrounded by and filled with love last night. The Native said he felt the same way. It was a wonderful, wonderful FHE and I will definitely be going monthly when I get back from California.

After FHE we went to Bow&Arrow's house for a while. I started to feel crappy again so I was sort of anti-social. Then I remembered my car was at the Native's house and it was past curfew. Sure enough, there was a little red boot on the front tire of my car. Red is so not her color. I was sort of beyond caring though and Bow&Arrow drove me home.

At some point I was crying while texting the Native (I'm so emotional sometimes, I swear), but then I read an email from Cuorderoy and it soothed me. I fell asleep typing a response and woke up at 12 pm on Tuesday. Wow.

God was kind enough to send me dreams of ringing handbells and I woke up in a good mood. The Native (I don't know what I did to deserve him) picked me up and we went out to Smart Cookie and then got my boot taken care of. I then had to go to Psychology, which was boring as usual, but afterwards I read The Bell Jar (so therapeutic, you have no idea) and made dinner at the Native's house. Then I took the Masseuse grocery shopping which was more fun than it sounds.

Several hours later I still haven't done my homework, but I don't care much. It will get done eventually. It always does. Plus I'm excited to see Gwumpkie tomorrow. Yes, it was a rocky couple of days but things are settling and I'm feeling calm.


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