The way things are

Life is a really hard game. The pieces keep falling out of those teeny little cars!

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Conversation

I talked to Boy for a couple hours last night.

All my questions were answered. I let him know how I had felt, how I do feel... I hurt him too, which was strangely comforting. It's nice to know I wasn't the only one who had a rough week.

I tried to be nice, but he insisted I hold nothing back. I occasionally made snide comments, but I think we did a good job of being grownups. We talked about exactly what had happened, what mistakes were made, and what misunderstandings there were.

Both of us still want to be friends even though the romance is over. Things are going to be a lot different. I told him I don't want to see him for a while; I need to get into the swing of things in Provo, get back on my feet, heal a little bit. I'll know when I'm ready to see him.

I still have regrets about the whole situation, but they aren't worth dwelling on. I'm still hurt and a little bit angry about what happened; I just need time. Sometimes things happen that just can't be repaired--we can't go back in time and change our actions--and we have to just let it go. Boy knows he was a jerk, he understands that I'm mad, but he can't change what happened or how he feels. And I can't keep harboring resentment. He's done all he can to resolve things with me, now it's just a matter of me moving on.

I'm still a little tender. I just need time. Going back to Provo is going to be good for me.

Oh, and I appreciate all of you that were protective of me--AtP you cracked me up last night--but I don't want to hold on to resentment. I'm really grateful for all the support I was given, but be nice to Boy. It's time to forgive and forget and move on.

Plus I got my hair cut and colored yesterday and I look dead sexy. So which of you Moho's will be taking me on a date first? :)

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