I finished eating my cereal this morning just in time to notice it expired almost two months ago. It took me a moment to figure it out though because I couldn't remember what year it is.

It was then that I fully realized I'm more messed up than I've been admitting. Don't get me wrong--things certainly could be worse. But all the anger has gone and I'm just left with a gnawing sadness. I can forget it for small periods of time, and sleeping is much easier than it should be, but waking up in the morning just gets tougher and tougher. Another day. I'm surprised I actually did my hair and makeup today.

Another thing I realized is that the romantic aspect of this mess is bothering me a bit. I meant it when I said I'm okay being single; the problem is I'm not okay with him being taken by someone that isn't me. I miss the way things used to be with him and I, but apparently he's doing well having fun with some other girl.

And no email yet. It's only been a day though. I should give it at least three days before I worry.
I'm hoping things will resolve themselves when I get back to Provo when I can get back into my normal, busy life (read: when I can flirt with guys in my ward and classes, make new friends, and hang with my old friends).

Only one more week. One more week and I'll be busy with things to do instead of sitting around here feeling sick to my stomach.

Though I was dreading the two concerts this weekend, I've been extremely grateful for them.